Hello lovely souls,
I’m Aparnaa Jadhav, your guide on the journey of healing, self-love and renewal. Today I want to gently walk you through a question many women ask (and often whisper to themselves): How do I Forgive Myself and Move Forward? If you’ve been carrying regret, shame or the heaviness of the past — know this: you’re not alone, and you can create a new chapter.
Why Self-Forgiveness Matters
When we make choices that hurt ourselves or others, we often get stuck in a loop of “if only”, “I should have”, “how could I”. That loop keeps us frozen. We lose connection with our own worth, our own future, and the possibility of freedom. Understanding how do I forgive myself is a powerful shift: it’s not about ignoring or excusing what happened, it’s about acknowledging, learning and then stepping into your life with gentleness. Because self forgiveness isn’t self-indulgence — it’s self-respect.
When you forgive yourself you give yourself permission to heal. You release the burden of shame and open the door to living differently. When you practice “forgive myself” mindset, you set in motion growth, peace and choice. And from my own journey – being a woman who’s walked through separation, reinvention and self-rediscovery – I’ve seen the deep power of this work.
Steps to Self Forgiveness
Here are practical, compassionate steps you can take. These aren’t quick fixes—they’re soulful practices. Choose one, two or all, and let your pace guide you.
1. Acknowledge and Accept What Happened
Begin by gently admitting the truth: you made a decision or experienced something that hurt you (or others). Saying it out loud in your journal or to a trusted friend can be powerful. This step is about facing reality, not escaping it. It’s the foundation of forgive yourself mentality.
2. Own Your Feelings, Without Judgment
You might feel guilt, anger, sadness, regret. All of it is valid. Allow yourself to feel. Don’t silence the voice saying “I should have done better”. Instead say: “Yes, I feel this. I recognise this.” By admitting the emotion you dismantle its hidden power. Self-forgiveness blooms when you meet your pain with honesty.
3. Learn the Lesson, Then Forgive Yourself
Ask yourself: What did this teach me? How has it shaped me? Extract the growth. Then choose to forgive yourself. It’s okay to say: “I forgive myself for…” and mean it. This isn’t about forgetting—it’s about freeing. When you say “I forgive myself” you reclaim your peace.
4. Make Amends If Needed, Release the Rest
If your actions impacted others, where possible, offer an apology or repair. Then accept what you cannot change, and let go of blame. Holding on to guilt or shame doesn’t change the past—it only isolates you from the present. Forgive yourself and move forward with grace.
5. Set a New Intention and Take Action
Self-forgiveness is incomplete unless you move. What will you do differently? What boundaries will you put in place? What fresh path will you tread? As a life coach who supports women rebuilding their confidence and identity, I encourage you to turn your “I forgive myself” into “Now I choose…” — choose healing, choose kindness, choose growth.
6. Practice Self-Compassion Daily
Every day, look in the mirror (or in your mind) and say something kind. Forgive yourself for slipping backwards. Celebrate the tiniest victory. When you embed self-forgiveness as a habit, it becomes your inner song rather than a one-time gesture.
What Happens When You Truly Forgive Yourself
When you move past the cycle of shame and “should have”, you start to live again. You’ll notice things like:
- Lightness in your mind — fewer “what ifs”, more creative possibility.
- Braver choices — because you’re no longer anchored by fear of failure or judgement.
- Better relationships — when you forgive yourself, you model for others how to treat you, so you naturally attract people who respect your growth.
- Deeper self-worth — you realise you are not defined by your mistakes, but by your willingness to learn and rise.
In my coaching work with women globally, this is the transformation I see: they stop being their own harshest critics and become their own strongest allies.
A Gentle Reminder
If you’re whispering “how do I forgive myself” right now, know this: the fact you’re asking means you’re ready to shift. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you’re perfect. It simply means you’re human — beautifully, imperfectly human — and you’re choosing to honour your next chapter.
When you teach your heart to say “I forgive myself”, you expose the truth that healing isn’t a destination, it’s a journey. You won’t always feel perfect, but you can always feel honest and aligned.
If you feel stuck, overwhelmed or unsure how to step forward, reach out. Coaching is not a sign of weakness — it’s a conscious choice to bring yourself back to life.
Dear one, you’re not defined by your past. You are emerging through it. Breathe in the possibility of a lighter tomorrow. Forgive yourself. And step into your next chapter with open arms.
With warmth and belief in you,
Aparnaa Jadhav
Life Coach for Women & Relationship Resilience Mentor
